(here is prelude again, and I’m gonna go ahead and slap a big ol trigger warning on this one: tw: miscarriage. sorry folks, this is the soap opera AU.)
It’s generally considered that the nightmare scenario for a dispatcher is to take a call in which a friend or family member is involved, but John’s got three brothers in three separate lines of emergency service, and it’s not that big a city. He’s pretty sure if he worked it out, he’d find he routes a call to one or the other of them at least once a week, and this is compounded by the fact that he hears about it, any time one of his colleagues dispatches one of the Tracy brood for whatever reason. John and his brothers are halfway to being city mascots, by this point.
It’s probably because he and his brothers are almost city mascots, and that John’s already a senior dispatcher despite being in the younger half of the crew, and because John hasn’t frozen on a call in years that his supervisor stands him down immediately.
It’s probably mostly the latter.
It’s a minor miracle that John’s here. She so easily could’ve been alone.
Gordon’s feeling good as he saunters the half-block down to Penny’s cafe.
In the end, he’d had to admit that they’re not really family.
yJohn watches the scene unfold like it’s happening to someone else.
He’s aware he’s slipping into the slightly disassociated, divorced mindset of an operator, not a brother, but he suspects if he’s the brother right now, he’d break right beside Gordon.
As it is, Gordon is shattering right before his eyes, crumpling down into his right there on the uncomfortable plastic chair, trying to grapple with the enormity of the future that is now no longer theirs.
A part of John, a cruel horrible part he tries to keep as far away from his family as possible, wonders how Gordon and Penny could be so stupid, but John ruthlessly suppresses that thought too. Accidents happen, no birth control was perfect. Moot point now.
John shifts to cover his own discomfort. “Gordon? Speak to me, you okay?”
Gordon’s eyes flash daggers. “Do I look okay,” he snarls, and there’s anger. Gordon not only wears his emotions on his sleeve, he also moves through them sometimes too fast for John to keep up. “Sorry, not mad at you,” Gordon adds before John can reply, and there’s another shift.
Gordon’s shoulders are already pulling back, his head up to look around, spot a likely candidate. It’s the shift John has been looking for, and that it’s come so quickly is an oddly positive sign. “She’s down there, second last bed on the ward.” Gordon’s a heat-seeking missile as he pushes through the end-of-visiting-hours crowd.
John’s kind of forgotten about Penny’s colleague until she drops down in the seat so recently vacated. “You’re Penny’s friend, right? Uh, James?”
“John.” He looks at her badge again. “Moffie, I assume?” He manages a smile at her sharp little nod. “Sorry we’re not meeting under better circumstances.” He settles back, preparing to wait. “Um, I can tell Penny you stopped by,” he adds as Moffie tucks her own bags under her seat and tries to get comfortable.
“No offense, John,” she replies, sharp as a rabbit. “But I think right now you, all of you, could use a friend.” Her smile is oddly sweet for this place. “Besides, I’ve got nowhere to be.”
John nods slowly, managing an elegant enough gesture for her to take the seat she’s already claimed. Moffie response with a regal tilt of her head as she pulled a paper takeout bag onto her lap. “Here, Miss E gave us some muffins, and you look like a man a long time between meals.”
John’s stomach growls, making a liar out of him before he can even speak. Moffie pushes it and a paper napkin onto his lap, where he has to take it or let it drop. But she doesn’t comment at the way he picks at it, crumbling it down between his fingers as the minutes tick by and the crowds thin and still Gordon doesn’t reappear with news.
John’s back is aching, and its a relief to get up, stretch his legs on the short walk to dump the disassembled muffin in the trash. The movement brings his closer to the nurses’ station for the floor, and its only because he’s there does he hear the polished, almost exaggerated English accent ask for Penny by her full name.
He has no right to, but he strides over anyway as the nurse asks for his relationship. “As good as family, ma’am.”
Somehow, John doubts that.
Rent Day Blues 